Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Day 10

I am so glad we have been busy lately. It makes the days go a little faster. This wait is really getting to me. I feel so helpless knowing that ours and Anna's future is in the hands of some person in the USCIS office. I know that isn't true. Our future is in God's hands. It still is hard knowing we are one stamp of approval away from getting her. I have such a hard time seeing little babies right now, knowing that we are missing this stage of her life. If we had the money and vacation time we would just go there and wait. According to Vietnam, she is ours and we could go through the Giving and Receiving ceremony any time. The problem with that is we don't know how long the wait will be. We do have a certain date in mind that we may just pick up and go get her and wait there.

I wanted to share some pictures from Mother's Day. I know I'm a little late but I had to wait for Allie to put them on the computer for me. I need to learn to do that some day I guess.

This is the Magnolia tree that my family bought for us on the one year anniversary of Emma's death. It bloomed just in time for Mother's Day this year:

These are the rose bushes that Dean and Allie bought for me to add to the rose garden I am trying to make:

These are the Hydrangias I bought to put in front of the church in Emma's memory on Mother's Day. I have a spot by the house where I want to plant them. They are beautiful:

The verse I am putting at the bottom of this post is one I found recently that really spoke to me. It talks about finding treasures in the darkness, riches stored in secret places. I had never thought about this verse much at all, but it is so true that God sometimes uses the darkest times of our lives to show us the treasures He has placed before us so that we can know that He is real, that He is God. I can think of so many times I have been in such a dark place in my heart and in my spirit, and He broke through the bars of iron I had put up and showed Himself to me through a treasure like a magnolia tree that blooms on Mother's Day or a butterfly that brushes my cheek or a friend who calls just to say she cares. To be honest, I wish I didn't have to go through the darkness, but I'm so thankful for the treasures that I am finding along the way.

Thought for the Day: Day Ten
"I will go before you and will level the mountains;
I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron.
I will give you the treasures of darkness,
riches stored in secret places,
so that you may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel,
who summons you by name."
Isaiah 45:2-3


Erika said...

Thanks for leaving these beautiful messages on your blog. It helps us feel connected even though we are so many miles apart!
When I heard about Steven Curtis Chapman's daughter, it made me think of you. You understand better than most people ever could what they are going through. As I read through your last two entries I was just struck at how strong you are. Through you, God is teaching all of us important lessons / perspectives. Thank you for being so open with these. I continue to be reminded of patience and hope...
We will continue to pray for little Anna Grace - who hopefully will be joining her beautiful mother, father, and sister at home very soon!

sumi said...

I did a study on darkness once...it is in my favorite posts list at the very bottom of my blog page. What you said reminded me about what I said, but I think you said it better than me. :-)

I love all the flowers! That magnolia is gorgeous and I bet it smelled wonderful too. I am getting seriously tempted to plant a garden for Jenna, but I don't have much of a green thumb.

I still want to get together with you. I am not sure when I will get to go to the cemetery again, but I will let you know.

Hugs, praying for a speedy process at the USCIS office.

love you, my friend,

Sheree said...

What a beautiful message you have given. Do you know that even after these years that you have been gone from here in Youngstown,that your life is still such and inspiration to me and makes me feel as though I can trust God through anything that I have to walk through. I continue to thank God you were in my life and still continue to be an influence to me.
Love you

Dean said...


Do you still have the same email address? I have something I want to send to you!